On the line

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It’s 3:51 pm and I’ve been standing in line for the pharmacy inside Rite aid since 3:21pm. The line has moved up 2 people and that includes the gal who had a dog in front of me and I think she had to take him potty.  Someone just now came down the line to get our names. 

I am now 10th in line. I have to wait because I need to pick up Luna’s estrogen patches before she goes to her dads for the weekend. They only let you refill like the moment she has to put on her next patch. This is the first chance I’ve had to camp out for this, within a window of time that no one can see in or out of. It’s ridiculous and it’s been like this the past couple months because of staffing shortages I guess? I know the people working here can’t be thrilled about it and I’m so glad at least they showed up to work today. It could be so much worse. 

Thankfully I can work from my phone. But this sucks. It’s like everything even minor inconveniences are just made extra hard these days. I see it in the eyes of everyone in this line. A lady just came down the main aisle and waved both her hands at us and growled “fuck that noise” as she turned around and exited the store.  

Welp. I’m thankful for my little “every other Friday” ritual with Noah and Carter when Ivy and Luna are gone*. We order Thai take out (Luna has a peanut allergy) with enough for weekend leftovers. It’s a highlight. It’s now 4:19pm and I’m in 3rd place to the finish line! I’ve made one friend and we are encouraging each other that we are almost there. We can do this! I joked next time that I’m going to bring my folding chair I used for Ivy’s soccer games and you know what that’s not a joke. They should offer seating along the way for whomever needs it, they don’t even have anything interesting to do or look at other than their boring barely stocked GNC shelves. They should have us take numbers so that we could shop around while we wait — I would fill a cart for sure and honestly could burn time just looking at the nail polish display. 

I made it out and it was almost 4:30. 

*it’s been almost 4 years doing this every other weekend with them gone, and I’m still not really used to it, or I mean, by now the groove has been worn into the woodwork of our routine, but it’s never not noticed each time especially on days my nerves are too close to the surface. Their step mom picked them up tonight because their dad is out of town and what a strange and indescribable feeling it is to let go in this way, truly a free fall into nothing. And then I’m glad because there’s Thai food to get and I remind my heart that I knew I couldn’t change my life and expect everything to stay the same, and I still found it necessary, knowing that. That’s what I was counting on. 

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